Overcoming obstacles, hindrances, and the like

I recently brought up an ambitious project with someone close to me. The immediate response was was, "you can't do that."

Two things came up for me:
1) I don't like hearing that I can't do something.
I prefer to explore all the options before believing a term as definite as "can't". Maybe it's the hours I've spent playing Freecell, trying to find my way out of an unpleasant layout.

In any case, I'd much rather determine for myself that I'm in a dead-end than accept the opinion of someone with equally limited information.

2) Of course I can; I just don't know how yet.

I really enjoy coming up with creative solutions to problems - it's one of my strengths (and yours too! If you can imagine why something won't work, you can imagine why it will).

So what's the course of action? Instead of arguing "can vs. can't" shift the conversation to "How can I?"

Check out page 97 of The Gift of Stress for more on how to Change the Questions You Ask Yourself.

Confusing stress with motivation

Do you use tension as a motivator? A lot of people put themselves in situations where they feel pressure to finish a project. The problem is that we start making an association that without stress you're not going to do anything.

This is just not true. Once you're doing something you actually find interesting and appealing you the action to follow through comes naturally. The activity actually becomes a labor of love... like eating ice cream.

How much pressure and "motivation" do you need to go to the freezer and set yourself up with a serving of your favorite flavor? I'd say it's pretty effortless - just something within you that gets you up and acting.

The trick is finding that same connection in whatever you've been using stress for.

More on stressless motivation can be found on page 42 in The Gift of Stress.

Why reinvent the wheel?

You've quoted from books, used song lyrics to express yourself, sent a picture that someone else took. Sometimes what you're trying to say has already been said. So why go through the hassle?

Happy holidays everyone!

(credit to the Huffington Post via Anthony King for the photo)