Get rid of canker sores fast!

Stress has a tremendous impact on your immune system¹. In fact, up to 90% of illness is stress-related.

Canker sores often reappear in periods of elevated stress. If they are a concern of yours, I highly recommend Gathering - a Young Living exclusive essential oil blend.

Place 2 drops on a cotton swab and then apply directly onto the sore². It can be applied when the sore is only starting to form as well. It doesn't taste particularly good, but you get over that quickly.

With 2 or 3 applications/day the sore typically goes away in 2-3 days instead of 5-6.

You can order gathering through my Young Living distributor site or calling Young Living's exceptional customer service line: 1-800-371-3515 and giving them my distributor #: 930469

¹ Cortisol build up will decrease immune function. This occurs because the immune system reacts to or is turned on by a specific set of hormones which are turned off by cortisol.

² Possible skin sensitivity. If pregnant or under a doctor's care, consult your physician. This statement has not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

Behind the Scenes of my Letterman Taping

My whole philosophy towards the Letterman taping was not to show off my coaching skills, nor to help Andy Kindler release his stress, but to have a fun time and be as cheerful as possible (and if we got to some coaching and stress-related material that'd be a great bonus.)

I taped with Letterman's crew for over an hour so there was a lot that didn't make it to the 3 minute compilation of all five coaches. Here's a few behind-the-scenes nuggets from the taping.

Intro
Stating who you are in a recording is called a 'slate.' Fortunately I've done some professional voice acting, and have a few slates under my belt. This came in extremely handy when the director asked me to introduced myself:

"Hi, my name is Zohar Adner, a Stress Release Coach with Stop Stressing Out.com"

The director didn't look too pleased with it. I was worried that he wasn't going to let me plug my website, but a moment later he asked me to, "take out the 'hi'."

I smiled; said, "Of course!" and just said the 'hi' in my head before proceeding. Why is it so important to say 'hi'? Because when you want to come off as friendly as possible, a friendly 'hi' is a great way to do so.

Glasses
You may have noticed near the end of the segment that the other coaches are making comments about Andy's glasses and how they fit his face. Why did they not show me in that series of clips? Here's our exchange:

Andy Kindler: "What do you think about my glasses? Do they work for me?"
ZA: "Do you see better with them on or off?"
AK: "On."
ZA: "I guess they work for you."

Andy responded with a pouty face indicating a mix of disappointment and amusement. While Abbott and Costello would have been proud, it didn't fit into the flow.

Posture
At one point Andy was getting a little antsy for material. I had already side-stepped the glasses bit (and a number of other goading questions about the coaching profession), but he and the writer really, really wanted a critique. So I decided to bite:

AK: "If you would change ONE THING about me, what would it be."
ZA: "I'd improve your posture. Your body has a variety of common postures - each associated with a different mood. When you want to feel less stress, shift your posture, and you'll feel your stress level instantly decrease."

Unfortunately the theory behind my suggestion wasn't shared with the viewing public.

On the phone
While I coached Andy on a park bench (which I have done a few times on gorgeous days for my one-on-one coaching clients in the lower Manhattan area), I conduct the majority of my coaching via telephone. At the time, the producers thought a fun way to end the entire segment would be with a shot of Andy talking on his cell phone, and then a pan/zoom across the street to me on a payphone.

Happiness 101

60 Minutes recently did a series on The Key to Happiness that includes discussion on what makes Denmark the happiest country in the world, and shares former Harvard Positive Psychology professor Tal Ben-Shahar's definition of happiness (and as we know from stress, it all starts with a definition.)

The Power of Yet

One of the steps to achieving consistent positive self-talk is adding the word 'Yet' to the end of a negative statement - it opens up the door for possibility (kind of like adding 'in bed' to fortune cookie predictions).

For example:
"I'm not good enough" becomes "I'm not good enough yet" (in bed)

What phrase do you use to negatively describe yourself?
How do you feel when you add 'yet' to that statement?

We're not at complete positive self-talk yet since adding 'yet' still leaves the negative phrasing in place.

Sometimes you can forgo the in-between steps and start feeling and behaving as though you've already achieved the result. Case in point this exchange in an episode of Seinfeld:

GEORGE: You're not really gonna go to California, are you?

KRAMER (points to his head): Up here, I'm already gone.

By embracing the feeling you expect to have afterwards, you can start enjoying it immediately.

The stress release --> ideal life continuum

A lot of people get caught up in their stress because they're used to it.

Oh sure, they're alive, doing their 'thing', but there's more out there ... an ideal...

Most people don't dare (or know how) to expand their frame of mind beyond their current situation to dream their impossible dream (sorry Cervantes). Practicality and reasonable-ness gets in the way. The thing is that your real, underlying ideals have no basis in practicality or reason. They're dreams, and the more we let ourselves recognize the adventure that's really going on in our heads, the better.

Without this expansion, you'll have no idea what your ideal is, or how close you can get to it.

Real-life scenario:
I conducted another Key to Stress Release workshop yesterday. In it, I coach a participant through the Seven R's of Stress Release starts with helping the coachee Recognize their ideals.

Last night's participant started talking about his (potential) need to move. As he was about to describe another two-bedroom apartment, I encouraged him to think bigger - the result that he'd love to have a house in Costa Rica.

While this may seem far-fetched (Where's the practicality?!?), it turned out that it wouldn't take much nudging or planning for him to actually have a house there (perhaps one he'd share with friends and/or family for the time-being), but it was not as distant as everyone else in the room thought it would when we first went down that path.

The biggest problem with the self-help movement is ...

the title 'self-help'

It makes too many people think that they should be able to read about techniques, use 5%, and tackle all their problems on their own. Change is a tough enough thing to accomplish, and just because you buy a hammer, wood and nails doesn't mean you're going to finish building your dream house.

Sometimes people end up getting caught up (or lost) in all the various things they could be doing ...


Spider Robinson penned a wonderful line - "Pain shared is lessened, joy shared, increased -- thus do we refute entropy*"

While it's up to the individual to create the change they seek, doing so in isolation is far from the best course of action. The trick is finding the right people to partner with on the journey.

Perhaps "Life's Journey" is too corny a name for what people are learning about and undertaking, but at least it's more accurate and empowering. I'm still tossing around these possibilities:
Life Development
Life Fulfillment
Life Growth
Life Actualization
Life Enhancement

In the meantime you may want to ask yourself:

What am I trying to do on my own?
Who do I know that no longer has that concern? (someone I can learn from)
What's going on in their life that I could help with?

Or hire a professional to spend less time dreaming about, crafting, and building the dream house that is your life. (A good coach will also help you enjoy the process and results more)




* entropy is the tendency for increased randomness (aka craziness & hecticness)

Stressed out caregivers

The three main types of caregivers I come across are:

• Parents supporting and raising their kids
• Children looking after their parents
• People whose job is to support others (teachers, sales people, nurses, receptionists, etc.)

The next time you talk to such a person ask, "Who's taking care of you?"

Most likely you'll get an exhaled laugh with eyes rolling up (to indicate a pipe-dream "I wish"), or down (to indicate "I gave up on that wish").

For all you caregivers out there running on fumes - it may seem impossible* to fit in, but a little time where you are the focus of the care will have a tremendous impact on your ability to provide the quality of service you're determined to give.

Whether it's an extra walk through the park, asking someone to help you, meditating for 15 minutes, taking a bath (with essential oils), light reading, a fun evening with friends, or a myriad of other options to relax and rejuvenate. You have to find a way to recharge your batteries. The people who rely on you deserve to be treated by the best you possible.

Note: Shopping, watching television, and drinking alcohol do not fit the rejuvenating criteria.

* it's not impossible, it's just different from what you're currently doing